You know everything you think about can sometimes make you or break you. People, like myself, who have mental health issues hold a lot of things in whether they are good or bad. We can be some of the nicest people you will ever meet, but we can also explode like a nuclear bomb when setting off. The best part is society tries to hold us accountable for our actions but a doctor will tell different based on each individual’s mental health status. A good scenario will be one of my experiences. I have told my step-mother-in-law that I never know how I am going to wake up every morning whether I am going to have a good day or bad day. The moment I walk into the room, she is all over me about something, whether it is “telling me”that I am cooking dinner, or when I am going to wash our clothes. She is just overbearing sometimes and I don’t understand how my father-in-law puts up with her. All day long she does nothing but complain and gossip. Yet, she professes to be an “anointed” Christian. She tries to stick her nose into other people’s business just so she has something to gossip about.
Well, she has not wanted for anything as far as food is concerned for the last seven months.We have packed both her refrigerator and stand-up freezer with food and it isn’t good enough for her she wants more like the glutton she is. She is maybe four feet tall and weighs just as much as me at about two hundred and fifty pounds. Granted I stand about six feet and built like a football player. Everyone on this side of the family calls her a “troll”, but I have tried to be nice. She just makes it impossible. Whenever I bake a cake I am required to share it with her, but she made a cake tonight, and when I politely asked her for a piece, she accused me of stealing, or sneaking, cake out of the house. I went in to grab a few cans of ravioli’s and this is what I’m met with. I am so angry that I cried. It is so petty to accuse someone of taking some food, but it is the respect thing and the fact that she accused me of taking food when for the last seven months she has been eating off of my husband and myself. She even feeds her daughter, who makes more money than God, with the food we put in the house. She doesn’t think she does any wrong and I am so over it and tired of holding my tongue to this woman but I do out of respect for my father-in-law. I respect him but she has lost any respect from me and she will find out when we buy food again.
She made the comment the other that we have to buy groceries and we are not doing it. We live in a tent in their yard so we will act like we are homeless and buy food that doesn’t need to be kept in a house. I have done it for twenty-three years out of my life it will not hurt me to do it again for a few more weeks. This makes eight months we have lived in this tent and she has spent the better of most of it tormenting me and I feel unsafe in my environment because she brings me to my boiling point too often. It frustrates my husband every time I have to tell him about something she did because she only does it when no one is around. We have caught her in a lie once and she got mad and walked into the other room, so I know she will not like what I have to say to her if I explode.
You know it’s one thing to accuse me of stealing something worth money or that is valuable, but don’t accuse me of taking some cake or food when I didn’t, but it is just the principle behind it. We have supported her for eight months with food and she wants to accuse me of stealing some of her dry ass cake. I need out of here and into this house so badly I can almost taste it. I don’t want to say I hate her because it is not in me to hate someone, I just dislike her very much but have to play the good daughter-in-law until tomorrow when we go to the store and buy some more food with our last money to keep down in the tent with us. I’m sorry everyone I just need to vent so that I can let it go and pull my anger back. Thanks for listening.