Daily Journal 10/16/2017

Good morning, everyone. I can say it is a beautiful day outside, just a little chilly like a Fall morning. I have had my coffee for the morning and a nice hot shower. I have a doctor’s appointment around noon and then it is home to work on books.

I began the second round of editing on the second chapter of “The Battle for Joshua” and it is coming along nicely. There are not too many mistakes at all. It will be an easy read which is a good thing and I am anxious about publishing it. It will be going to the editor next week for a final edit.

I am getting better from being sick almost a month, but my husband has been coming down sick for the past few days. He is like me because neither of us likes to be sick. I feel so bad for him being sick but the only thing I can do is take care of him until he gets better.

We might have to take our five and a half-month-old puppy to vet because we noticed she has a large lump on the top of her head. It isn’t painful to her and could be a number of things but we need to find out if it is cancerous. She is my baby and I can’t see losing her.

Anyway, it is time for me to get ready for my appointment and I want to wish everyone with a birthday today, “Happy Birthday” and everyone else a very Happy Monday!! Take care.

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Daily Journal 10/15/2017

Good evening, everyone. So sorry for it being so late but was doing some fall cleaning which needed to be done seriously. It has been an exhausting day with all the cleaning and what not but my mood is okay today.

I have been out of my fast acting insulin for a few days now and only surviving on the long-acting which has been doing good keeping my sugar down. I have been watching what I eat so that there are no sugar spikes. I will be going to a convenient care clinic tomorrow to get a prescription for fast-acting insulin because my next primary care doctor appointment isn’t until October thirtieth.

I felt good enough to cook dinner today which was roast with potatoes, carrots, and some onions. It came out so delicious and everyone liked it. I have not cooked a good meal like that in a very long time and told my sister-in-law that we need to go back to having good dinners on Sunday which used to be one of my traditions.

As for my writing, I am working on the second round of editing for “The Battle for Joshua” and have plans to send to the editor around the end of the month. I have begun the fourth chapter of my next book which is the first in a vampire series and I look to reading it when done.

My sleep has been broken again and then I got a call that I cant see my mental health doctor or therapist at this one clinic because of my Medicare insurance. So tomorrow I will be calling another place and seeing what they have to offer. I have seen this doctor before and she prescribed me medication that actually didn’t work for me so I am curious as to what she will give me now?

I am finally winding down being sick and now my husband is sick and not feeling well at all. He brags that he doesn’t get sick but sure enough, he was wrong and has what every other person in this house has and that is an upper respiratory infection with bronchitis. I am finally getting over mine and loving every minute of it because I hate being sick.

I should be able to get back on schedule tomorrow now that I feel better but we will see. I hope everyone had a great weekend and look forward to going back to work tomorrow? To everyone with a birthday today, “Happy Birthday” and everyone else I wish you to have a quiet relaxing night. Take care.

Daily Journal 10/12/2017

Morning, everyone. Today is day three since my blow up and it is still kind of a nightmare with the other family members in the house but all I can do is ignore them like they don’t exist. That is how I am coping right now. I can’t believe that he and they did us so wrong and all we did was look out for them.

Other than that, I will be doing some major cleaning of the kitchen today with my husband’s help. All of the food and dishes need to come out and the cabinets cleaned and bleached out. Pest control is going to be taken care of as well.

My husband and I got our new bed yesterday and we slept so well last night. I was still up every few hours to run to the bathroom but sleep was good. I am sitting here at the kitchen table with my sister-in-law enjoying coffee and she is getting ready to head back to bed for a few more hours due to all the stress around here.

I will be finishing up this post and starting on the cabinets since there is so much to do and I don’t want to be working on it all day. So, I will stop here and get started once I’m done with my coffee. “Happy Birthday” to everyone with a birthday today and to everyone else, have an awesome day.

Daily Journal 10/10/2017

Today has not been a very good day at all for me. Not only am I sick, but it just seemed like everything around me came crashing down this morning that invoked a mental breakdown. My husband and sister-in-law had to sick me down and let me cry for a few because I was feeling so angry that I just wanted to hit something.

Every little thing agitated me this morning and I became snappy at everyone around me and it just seemed like one thing after another came crashing down. I have come to realize that everyone else’s problems should be their own and not mine because besides having my own problems I have to deal with their issues and drama as well.

We moved our bedroom into the living room and our new mattress showed up this morning and the rest of our bed frame and everything should be here in the morning. My husband made a little corner of the room my corner so that it was my space. I can feel safe in my little corner without being bothered by anyone. This will be where I spend most of my time under the supervision of my husband so that I can remain safe.

I feel like I just want to isolate from the world again except through my writing. I have a heart of gold that wants to always open and help everyone around me even when it is detrimental to my own health and well-being, but I have to stop so that people cannot take advantage of my kindness anymore.

I want to devote myself to full-time writing so that I can share my stories plus make a better life for my husband, myself, and my dogs which are my babies. I cannot let everyone else’s drama interfere with my life anymore because it doesn’t help me and my family any and I am so tired of the stress.

Sometimes I wish I could just blink my eyes and my husband, babies, and I could just disappear to a deserted island or a place where no one else lived just so that I wouldn’t have to deal with other people. Even some family members are so screwed up that you know I go out of my way to help them and they slapped my face once and here they are getting ready to do it again and I can’t handle it.

Here we go again, I really feel like hitting something and getting all this pent up frustration out. I am going to put my face and mind in the computer and stay there and not deal with anyone else in this house except my husband. I have just had enough. I am canceling all appointments for tomorrow and just take some time for myself. I NEED IT!!

My therapist last week gave me an assignment to draw all the masks that I have ever used in life to hide the real me and give them a physical identity. It was supposed to be something I could do but right now the only mask wanting to come out would be anger and I need to roll my emotions back first before beginning this assignment. I apologize Jennifer that it is not possible at the moment.

Well, I need to get off here because I could rant and rave all day and it would not do me any good or anyone else. I want to wish everyone with a birthday today, “Happy Birthday” and everyone else a glorious day.

Daily Journal 10/9/2017

Happy Columbus Day, Everyone! How is everyone doing this morning? I had a rough night last night with a bunch of coughing and having to pee all night long, but my mood is good today, so far. Yesterday, my husband, nephew, and I were moving rooms around since my nephew broke up with his girlfriend because her son kept beating up and bullying his younger boys.

She is gone now and things have been better around here as far as drama and stress. I still have to set our room up and put things away before coming into the kitchen for a thorough cleaning of all the cabinets and appliances. I’m also sitting here with my sister-in-law who may be pregnant and we are chatting about everything from her symptoms to how far along she may be and I think it is cute since I was never able to have any children.

Today will be a good day to work on writing because it is raining outside and gloomy so why not put my mind somewhere else than being dull because it is dull outside. I am going to close here to get started and wish everyone an awesome Monday. “Happy Birthday” to everyone with a birthday today as well. Take care.

Daily Journal 10/7/2017

Good morning everyone. Happy Saturday! I hope everyone didn’t party too much last night? I went to bed early last night on account of not feeling good mentally and got up early this morning and cleaned the house and I am not sitting here after two cups of coffee drinking a diet soda and getting my daily stuff done.

Everyone is still asleep and it is quiet around here being eight o’clock in the morning. I made my enchilada’s last night for dinner with a small bowl of ice cream for dessert before going to sleep in my husband’s arms. Even the dogs are still in bed with daddy.

I am looking forward to a beautiful day that is overcast right now but it could be raining outside and I would still call it beautiful because the rain washes the air clean of pollutants. I was not able to stick to my goal last night due to mental issues but will be getting them done this morning.

I also need to get some marketing done for my two books that are already published on Amazon so I can see more book sales. I have started chapter three of the new book and it looks promising as far as my friends say because I have given them the first two chapters to read and give me some feedback.

This is the best time for me to write when everyone is still asleep because it is quiet with no distractions except the washing machine since I have many loads of laundry to do today because Saturday is when all rugs and bedding get washed and changed.

I know this is a holiday weekend for most of you and I hope you enjoy it to the fullest. It is time for me to get to work before everyone gets up and to everyone with a birthday today, “Happy Birthday” and everyone else I wish for you to have an awesome Saturday and weekend and may your dreams and aspirations come true for you. Take care.